When sexual attraction changes – fluid, flexible, and absolutely valid
Abrosexual (also abrosexual or aberrosexual) describes people whose sexual attraction changes over time.
This means: your own orientation can shift in phases – from strong to weak, from same-sex to mixed-sex, or sometimes even to no attraction at all.
The most important point:
→ Abrosexuality is fluid.
The orientation remains, but how it expresses itself is allowed to change.
Many find this liberating – finally a term that explains why their attraction doesn’t always work the same way.
What exactly does abrosexual mean?
Abrosexual people experience sexual attraction:
- varying (e.g., sometimes a lot, sometimes hardly at all)
- in phases (e.g., different for weeks or months)
- in different directions (e.g., sometimes homosexual, then heterosexual or pansexual-leaning again)
- or at times not at all
These changes don’t have to be predictable or logical – they are simply part of one’s own experience.
Abrosexuality is a valid orientation and not “confusion” or “indecisiveness.”
What does abrosexuality feel like?
Many abrosexual people describe their orientation like this:
“I’m not always the same type of person – my attraction changes.”
“Sometimes I feel sexual, sometimes not at all.”
“Today I find several genders attractive, tomorrow only one.”
“I’m open – but in waves.”
“My orientation has phases, and that’s okay.”
There is no obligation for the attraction to change constantly.
It’s just about the fact that it’s allowed to.
Why does abrosexuality belong to the asexual spectrum?
Abrosexual is often assigned to the asexual spectrum (Ace spectrum) because:
- some phases involve little to no sexual attraction
- the orientation is more flexible and not permanently constant
- the sexual dynamics often deviate from the classic allosexual pattern
But important: Abrosexual ≠ asexual.
It is its own identity that can include both sexual and asexual phases.
Abrosexual vs. fluid vs. bi-curious – what’s the difference?
Many terms overlap, but abrosexuality is specific:
Sexual fluidity
→ general sexual flexibility, but doesn’t have to be in phases.
Bi-curious / questioning
→ experimental interest, but not a fixed orientation.
Abrosexuality
→ clear orientation with changing attraction, independent of experiences.
So abrosexuality doesn’t describe “still finding yourself,” but that fluidity itself is the constant.
Relationships as an abrosexual person
Yes, abrosexuals can have stable, loving relationships – just like any other orientation.
What’s important is:
- open communication
- understanding of changing needs
- emotional security
- flexibility without pressure
Abrosexuality doesn’t mean you have to change constantly, only that it can happen.
Common prejudices about abrosexuality
“You can’t make up your mind.”
→ Yes, we can. The orientation is the decision – and it is fluid.
“It’s just a phase.”
→ No. It’s many phases – that’s what makes it permanent.
“You’re constantly different.”
→ No more or less than people in general. Just more consciously perceived.
“Abrosexual means unreliable.”
→ False. Orientation says nothing about reliability in relationships.
Why abrosexuality is important
Because it shows people that they aren’t wrong or unclear if their attraction doesn’t stay constant.
Abrosexual people often find a word for what they’ve always experienced only late in life – and that’s exactly what brings:
- Self-acceptance
- Clarity
- Community
- Freedom
Abrosexuality expands the understanding of sexuality – away from rigid, toward flexible.
Abrosexuality is the fluid form of sexual orientation
Being abrosexual means that your own attraction is allowed to change – depending on the phase, feeling, stage of life, or emotional state.
It is neither chaos nor flightiness, but a natural, diverse, and beautifully dynamic orientation.
A label that creates space for change. And for true self-determination.
